A totally stoatin bevvy
A UK supermarket has started putting descriptions of wines in Georgie, Scouse and other regional varieties of English, according to this article. They believe that the normal descriptions are too confusing and complicated and don’t use everyday language.
In Scouse (spoken in Liverpool) it’s, “A totally boss bottle of Merlot which smells o’ blackberry, choccie, a brew and toffees. Juicy and complex like, this bevey is top wi most scran ‘specially me ma’s scouse. Tellin ye, this is deffo a bevey that will leave youz and youz mates made up over yez Sayers pastie.”
In Somerset it’s “Alright my luvver, eers one helluva Merlot. Be stinkin hummin a sivvies thar be bleddy ansome wi yaw croust or oggy. Purfect ta share wi yaw pardy as i’ aiin ta eavy. Mygar be a purdy wine! Churs!”
The title of this post is from a Scots version of the description, and in Geordie (spoken in Newcastle) a Merlot is described as “A canny Merlot ableeze wi succulent blackcurrants an blueberries. This Merlot has legs leik a thoroughbred, strong an forward, tha sucks the leif oot of yer palate. Its stowed bouquet is a delight fer yer nose an will leave yee clamming fer moor. This ain ne blash”
A spokeswoman for the supermarket said, “Local shopkeepers and suppliers came up with the dialect – it’s not come from central office or from a computer,” she insists. “We know that people don’t really talk like this – we just wanted to make wine buying accessible and fun.”